Unacceptable Angry Remarks: What Not to Say in a Fit of Anger
How to Communicate when Angry: Tips from a Life Coach
We all experience disagreements and conflicts with others at some point in our lives, and this can often lead to feelings of anger. While it can be difficult to manage, it’s important to be mindful of how we communicate during these moments.
According to a report from The Independent, American life coach Stef Ziev suggests that there is a particular sentence pattern that should be avoided when expressing anger. Ziev advises against using the phrase “You make me feel (…)” when speaking to a friend, colleague, or partner in a moment of anger. This, according to Ziev, can personalize the situation and potentially escalate the conflict in an undesirable way.
In a recent interview, Ziev gave an example of how to rephrase such a statement. Instead of saying “You make me sad,” Ziev recommends expressing, “It’s hard for me when you do this and I feel worthless.”
However, managing one’s language in moments of anger is not always easy. Ziev suggests that if a problem cannot be resolved, it’s best to take a step back and walk away from the conversation until you feel calm.
In addition to this, Ziev offers a list of tips for expressing anger in a healthy way:
1. Determine the purpose of the speech.
2. Do not personalize the issue.
3. Contribute to solving the problem.
4. Be willing to move the discussion forward.
5. Listen to the other person’s demands.
6. Give positive feedback.
By keeping these tips in mind, individuals can learn to communicate their anger in a more constructive and respectful manner, ultimately leading to healthier and more productive interactions with others.
